First thanks to hongcheng for that nice thingi, except for the abs part, which we all know you have many on your hot bod. Anyway since i dont have a bio test tml, unlike 90% of the canoeist, i shall post some jokes to entertain you all who are drowning in the sea of biomisery.

1. A lovesick kayaker wrote to a dating service explaining that he had specific criteria for a potential mate and would not accept anyone that doesn't meet his standards. He went on to explain the young lady must be cute, short, enjoys cold water and paddling.

He received a reply the following week. It contained a picture of a penguin.HAHAHAHA

2.How many paddlers does it take to change a light bulb?
4; 1 to change it and 3 to go: Nice Turn. Nice Turn. Nice Turn.

3.Ten reasons for buying a heavy canoe.

10 - You're spouse never has to worry about you kayaking alone because you'll need a friend to get the kayak to the water

9 - In reference to number 10, you'll find out fast who your real friends are

8 - Gravity is on your side when heading down river

7 - Icebergs will part from your path at the first site of your TC2

6 - You can create interesting washes on the canal

5 - Narrowboats get out of your way

4 - Gun turrets on deck are allowed

3 - Cool retracting portage wheels

2 - No-one's going to nick it - not on their own, anyway

1 - Finally an excuse to get aREALLY big car

4.You May Be a Paddler If …

-you can't drive over a bridge without looking for water under it

-you love it when it rains during the week

-you wash hang whilst driving on the M40

-you lean to the right whilst turning left on your bicycle

-you attempt a slap support whilst skateboarding

-you tie down the boat better than you seatbelt in the kids.

-your friends or relatives are shocked when you answer the phone at home on a
weekend.

-your idea of a complete first aid kit is a roll of duct tape

-your boat is worth more than your car

-you measure major purchases relative to the cost of a new boat...('Hmmm, that new computer will cost me about 2 ¼ kayak units')

-when your non boating friends visit your home or your car they ask "Do you have dogs?"

-you leave your glasses strap on at night
-you visit Niagara Falls and think "That'd need an overstern."

-the dog you bought after your friends last visited loves to roll in your pile of paddling clothes.

-you no longer find a shirt and tie uncomfortable as both are more tolerable than dry cag neck seals

-you are fascinated by the recirculation of water in the sink when you turn the tap on full blast

-you pay attention to adverts mentioning wings

-you find yourself kicking the clutch pedal when driving instead of using the steering wheel

-you approach a car parking space at a 45 degree angle, crash into the kerb, leap out and attempt to sling the car over your shoulder.

lol

Labels: luigi

Updated@9:21 PM